You Don’t Attract The Wrong Men, You Just Think You Do…

Key Takeaways:

  • Understanding your core values is essential to attracting the right man
  • It is important to secure yourself in your own being before entering into new relationships
  • Be mindful of your mindset when attracting relationships
  • Putting effort and time into forming a meaningful connection is always worth it
  • Be true to yourself and have patience in the process

Are you tired of being drawn to men who just don’t seem to fit the bill? Do you find yourself attracted to men who are bad for you, but can’t quite put your finger on why? The truth is, attraction is a complex and often enigmatic thing, and understanding it can be the key to finding the right partner.

1. Attraction is Not a Choice: It’s a Complex Cocktail of Traits and Characteristics

First and foremost, it’s vital to understand that attraction is not something we can control. People are attracted to certain traits and characteristics, and it’s not a choice we make. This means that even if you think you’re attracted to the “wrong” type of men, it doesn’t mean you’re doing anything wrong.

  • Some people are attracted to confidence and assertiveness, while others are drawn to vulnerability and sensitivity
  • Some are attracted to a sense of humor, while others are drawn to intelligence and ambition
  • Physical appearance also plays a role in attraction, but it’s not the be-all and end-all

2. You May Be Attracted to Traits That Aren’t Healthy for You in a Partner

It’s important to remember that just because you’re attracted to someone, it doesn’t mean they’re good for you. It’s possible that you may be attracted to traits that aren’t healthy for you in a partner. For example, you may be attracted to a man who is emotionally unavailable because it’s familiar to you, but it’s not a trait that will lead to a healthy and fulfilling relationship.

  • You may be attracted to men who are emotionally unavailable or distant because you’re used to it from past relationships
  • You may be attracted to men who are emotionally unstable or unpredictable because it’s familiar to you
  • You may be attracted to men who are bad communicators because you don’t value good communication in a relationship

3. Attraction Can Change Over Time and People Can Grow to Be Attracted to Different Traits

It’s essential to remember that attraction can change over time. As we grow and evolve, our
tastes and preferences change as well. This means that the traits and characteristics that we once found attractive may no longer hold the same appeal. This also means that it’s possible to develop attraction for traits that we once didn’t find appealing.

  • As we gain more life experience, our perspective on what we find attractive may change
  • Our attraction may change as we learn more about ourselves and what we truly desire in a partner
  • As we change, so do our attitudes and tastes, and this also applies to attraction

4. Attraction Can Be Influenced by Past Experiences and Relationships

Our past experiences and relationships can also shape our attraction. If we’ve had a string of bad relationships with men who possess certain traits, it’s possible that we may continue to be attracted to those traits, even if they’re not healthy for us. This is because our past experiences shape our beliefs and attitudes about what we deserve in a partner.

  • If you had a string of bad relationships with men who were emotionally unavailable, you may continue to be attracted to men who possess that trait
  • If you had a string of bad relationships with men who were bad communicators, you may continue to be attracted to men who possess that trait
  • Past experiences and relationships shape our beliefs about what we deserve in a partner and can influence our attraction

5. Attraction Can Be Influenced by Societal and Cultural Influences

Societal and cultural influences also play a role in attraction. Media and pop culture often present a narrow and unrealistic view of what is attractive, which can shape our beliefs about what we should find attractive. It’s important to be aware of these societal and cultural influences and not let them dictate our attraction.

  • Society often presents a narrow view of what is considered attractive, such as certain body types or physical characteristics
  • Media and pop culture can shape our beliefs about what a “perfect” partner should look and act like
  • It’s crucial to be aware of these societal and cultural influences and not let them control our attraction

6. Attraction is Not the Only Factor in a Fulfilling Relationship: Compatibility is Key

Attraction is certainly important, but it’s not the only element in a fulfilling relationship. Compatibility is just as vital. It’s possible to be attracted to someone, but not be compatible with them in terms of values, goals, and lifestyles.

  • Attraction is important, but it’s not the only factor in a fulfilling relationship
  • Compatibility in terms of values, goals, and lifestyles is just as important
  • A fulfilling relationship requires both attraction and compatibility

7. Attraction Can Be Developed Over Time Through Shared Experiences and Building a Connection

Attraction can also be developed over time through shared experiences and building a connection. It’s possible to be friends with someone first and then develop attraction as you get to know them better.

  • Attraction can develop over time as you get to know someone better
  • Shared experiences and building a connection can lead to attraction
  • Attraction doesn’t have to be instantaneous, it can grow over time

8. Be Open to Different Types of People and Don’t Limit Yourself Based on Preconceived Notions

It’s important to be open to different types of people and not limit yourself based on preconceived notions of who you should be attracted to. Remember, attraction is not a choice and can be influenced by many factors. Don’t close yourself off to the possibility of attraction to someone who may not fit your usual “type.”

  • Be open to different types of people and don’t limit yourself based on preconceived notions of who you should be attracted to
  • Don’t close yourself off to the possibility of attraction to someone who may not fit your usual “type”
  • Remember that attraction is not a choice and can be influenced by many factors, so keep an open mind

9. Reflect on Past Relationships and Learn from Them

Reflecting on past relationships can also be beneficial when trying to understand attraction. Take the time to think about why you were attracted to certain partners and what patterns you may have noticed. This can help you identify any negative patterns and learn from them, so you can make better choices in the future.

  • Reflect on past relationships and think about why you were attracted to certain partners
  • Look for patterns in your attraction to past partners, both positive and negative
  • Learn from past relationships and use that knowledge to make better choices in the future

10. Remember That Attraction is Not Set in Stone and Can Change Over Time

Attraction is not set in stone and can change over time. As we grow and evolve, so do our tastes and preferences, and this also applies to attraction. Keep in mind that what you find attractive now may not be the same in the future.

  • Attraction can change over time as we grow and evolve
  • Tastes and preferences can change, and this also applies to attraction
  • It’s important to be open to new possibilities

11. Realize That Attraction Does Not Guarantee a Successful Relationship

It’s important to remember that attraction is not a guarantee for a successful relationship. While attraction is important, it’s not the only factor in a successful relationship. Compatibility, shared values, and good communication are also necessary for a relationship to work.

  • Attraction is important, but it’s not the only factor in a successful relationship
  • Compatibility, shared values, and good communication are also necessary for a relationship to work
  • Attraction does not guarantee a successful relationship

Conclusion

Attraction is a wild and mysterious thing, and understanding it can be the key to unlocking the door to the perfect partner. Remember that attraction is not a choice and can be influenced by many factors. Be open to different types of people, reflect on past relationships, and be willing to change your perspective as you grow and learn more about yourself. Keep in mind that attraction is important, but compatibility, shared values, and good communication are also necessary for a successful relationship. Don’t limit yourself, and be open to new possibilities.

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