Relationships can take you for a ride, and not in a good way. Down a path of uncertainty, and difficult times. Yet we hang on for dear life as we are emotionally invested, and it’s not easy to walk away. Nor can you set aside your feelings, and tell him to kick rocks, get out, and on with your life. It is not that simple, but wishful thinking. The fact of the matter is people weigh many factors when they decide to leave, or remain in their relationships. So, when do you get to a place where Enough is Enough? Let’s talk about this.
I have seen and heard folks put up, and deal with all sorts in their relationships. Picking up their partners from their sweet heart’s home, and arguing/ fighting with other women. Sometimes we are quick to make judgments and claim that you would not do this or that. But you never know how you will react unless you are in the situation. However, no one should put up with an abusive relationship, period, that is when Enough is Enough, and you need to leave safely when the time is right.
Back to what I was saying, to speak hypothetically does not mean that when you are in the situation you will react rationally instead of emotionally. How many of us are good at deciphering what is best for us when we are emotional ? Even though deep down inside you know what you should do. Yet, we claim that our convictions will not allow us to put up with certain things in our relationship, but we all do.
Your Boundaries? What did you say about your boundaries? Do they even exist?
How many times have your boundaries been broken, tested, and you have given chances? Some folks say it depends on the offense as one time is more than enough. While others regardless of the offense they give first, second, and even third chances. Even when a partner is disrespectful, there are trust issues, and infidelity, some folks still give multiple chances.
But nothing is more intolerable than infidelity. And even then folks stick around. Why? Because you want to salvage your relationship. You want to be optimistic, to forgive, and give your partner the benefit of the doubt. Nothing is wrong with fighting for your relationship as long as there is room to communicate the issues, so that it is not ongoing. But he also has to fight for You!
However, in doing all of this to make it work, and if the issues are ongoing at some point you need to protect yourself from being taken advantage of. As sometimes the ones that we love hurt us. Whether it’s intentionally or unintentionally, it is not okay and it can become a major problem in the relationship. It is a problem when there is more pain than happiness. When you begin to question yourself. When your mental and physical being is at risk. That is not the price to pay for love. That is when Enough is Enough, right? But still it is not easy to walk away.
Sometimes it gets confusing when you are hurt, and in love with your partner. You want to go back to that good place. You go back and forth, what should you do. You drive yourself crazy thinking about it. You don’t want to be alone, or maybe you do want to be alone, but you doubt yourself, the potential to meet another, and the ability to move on with your life.
Perhaps it’s the children, maybe you cannot sustain financially, or you are simply going to miss him. So, you find yourself stuck and keep saying one more offense and you’re done. And he keeps pushing your boundaries to the point where the boundaries no longer exist or respected. And his behavior becomes acceptable, and a new normal in your relationship. Oh my gosh!
It is your relationship you can do whatever you want. Don’t feel embarrass as we have all been there at some point. And it’s not easy, who ever said relationships are easy?
When you are making a decision about your relationship make sure that you are doing what is best for you. The only person that has to deal with the situation is you. You want to have a clear mind, and to put everything on the table. Your fears, hurt, sadness, and make sense of it all. The only person that knows the relationship best is you. You know what is in your heart, and when Enough is Enough. Trust that you are making the right decision for yourself. If you decide to stay that is your decision, and you will find a way to make it work. If you decide to leave then you have had enough, and it’s time to turn the page.
Thank you folks for reading. Please share your comments. Are you in a relationship or have been where you had enough? I would love for you to share.