My Boyfriend Occasionally Takes Drugs. Is It Unreasonable To End Our Relationship Because Of It?
Drug use can have an immeasurable impact on a relationship, and it is important to consider when making decisions about love and commitment. A recent piece from Mahogany Relationships has tackled this difficult topic, asking whether it’s unreasonable to end a relationship if the person occasionally takes drugs.
The article acknowledges the complexity of this decision, recognizing that drug use can range from cigarette smoking or alcohol to use of illegal substances like marijuana, cocaine, or illegal drugs. Whatever the situation, it’s important to recognize the effect that drug use can have on any person’s mental and physical health, as well as its effect on the relationship overall.
The article dives deeper into the subject by examining some of the potential conclusions that could be drawn. It touches on how drug use can impact relationships and considers how decisions about a partner’s drug use can be difficult for both parties. In the end, it’s important for both partners to evaluate the situation and decide for themselves what is best for their relationship.
Key Takeaways
- Consider the impacts that drug use can have on mental and physical health.
- Drug use can impact relationships differently depending on the substance used.
- It is important for both partners to evaluate the situation and make a decision for themselves.
- It is necessary to take into account the effect of drug use on the relationship.
- Consider how drug use could impact the hopes and dreams of the future.
My partner (29) of one and a half years is a terrific, sweet soul and we have many shared worths. I might see myself aging with him. He periodically does drugs (drug and euphoria) with his previous uni friends. I’ve never ever even smoked a cigarette and understanding he periodically does drugs makes me unpleasant. Even if it’s just at parties every few months, I fret about him having a bad batch and passing away. It likewise feels really unethical due to all the human trafficking in the supply chain. It seems like a deal-breaker concern.
I’ve asked if he ‘d stop utilizing drugs for the sake of our relationship. He stated he would if he had kids however would likely attempt them once again when the kids are older. I’ve even attempted to flag the threats of bad batches and he’s pointed to the stats that he’s most likely to be hurt horse riding or doing severe sports. He likewise seems like I’m enforcing my views on to him and asked why I have not taken a strong view on him consuming at the weekends.
As coarse as it sounds I ‘d be more comfy understanding he passed away paragliding than due to the fact that of a bad batch of MDMA. Due to the fact that of his occupation, I didn’t inquire about substance abuse early on as I presumed people of a specific occupation would not do leisure drugs. Am I enforcing my own views and being unreasonable if I end our relationship since of his substance abuse?
Eleanor states: I believe this might be a circumstance where the currency of reasonableness will just buy a lot.
I hear the logical premises for this choice of yours, especially the danger of overdose, I really do. I do not like to compose a good deal about my own life here however think me that I understand how frightening this can be. This is why there are screening sets and fantastic resources to ensure that people who mean to utilize drugs recreationally are much better able to keep themselves informed and safe.
— and I hope you’ll forgive me stating so– it’s tough to believe that issues about principles and the possibility of overdose exhaust what’s bothering you here. You likewise discuss you ‘d be “more comfy” if he passed away paragliding (despite the fact that he ‘d be similarly dead) which you ‘d believed he would not do drugs as a member of “a particular occupation”. In a world where he just did fairly lab-made drugs, in controlled amounts so he ‘d constantly be safe, would you then be comfy?
There are some ideas in your letter that the response may be no, which these factors aren’t the only things you’re uneasy about. Ludwig Wittgenstein stated that after we tire reason there’s a point where we can state absolutely nothing else; we just struck bedrock and need to state “my spade is turned”. It sounds to me like being unpleasant with drugs may be a bedrock concern for you.
Which’s an okay location to turn your spade. You do not need to reveal your working for every sensation; you particularly do not require to make an argument that’s convincing particularly to him. When others do not share our greatest choices, we frequently alchemise them into unbiased ethical arguments. “I much like truth television” ends up being “you’re snobby for not wishing to see this with me”; “I simply do not actually like avoiding late” ends up being “a few of us need to be up in the early morning”. Due to the fact that these things feel essential to us, we can act as though ours is the only sensible choice, specifically when the authenticity of that choice feels under risk.
However, you are enabled to have things that are simply bedrock choices. You do not need to like drugs, or be okay with a partner who does. You’re permitted to desire a relationship without this asymmetry. There will be huge parts of his social life and emotional experience you’re not a part of, and early mornings after can be very dull, even distressing, for the sober half of a couple.
It may assist to prosecute this as a matter of strong choice, rather of an argument with a set of affordable facilities and a conclusion that others ought to accept. There may end up being One True Moral Answer about drugs, however the opportunities that either of you or your sweetheart have actually discovered it are slim.
What you have here might simply refer choice, however you can treat your choices as definitive factors for you to act. Simply do not anticipate they’ll be definitive for others.
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